The Benifits Of Living Life and Learning From my Past
So as you may or may not know, I decided to get clean off of all drugs and alcohol on Nov.26th of 2007 and since that time I learned a lot about myself and how I can (or sometimes can't) function in "normal society". I got a great job working with The City of Vancouver and I made some really great friends (real ones this time and not just voices in my head!) that support and love me no matter how spun out I get sometimes. But all this wasn't enough to stop the eventual relapse that I had in September of 2009. I allowed the walls and defense mechanisms of my learned behaviors of my youth and the life I led on the streets come back up. This causes a domino effect in my life, that in hindsight I actually saw but choose to ignore and it eventually took me to a place where I made a decision to drink again. I am happy to say that it didn't take me years to get back to the Fellowship and that I am once again going strong with my recovery as of October 31st, 2009, but all that could change in an instant if I don't remain honest with myself and those around me. Vigilance against this baffling power of addiction coupled with what I have learned in AA is my only defense against that first drink or drug use. The coolest thing I have learned these last couple of years is that I can choose to be loaded or not. I can choose a better life for myself that doesn't involve hustling drugs, shady people, living on the streets, and crime. I can choose a life, though overwhelming at times and hard to deal with I can make it thorough the day to day with the hand of AA always there to lead the way.